“With mindfulness – the practice of peace – we can begin by working to transform the wars within ourselves.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
You know I’m a fan of mindfulness and meditation.
But meditation alone is not all that and a bag of chips! 🙂
It won’t make your woes go away or even make you a better person.
Meditation is also not for everybody. Some people connect to their being through movement, dance, art, and walks in nature.
It’s all good.
Don’t approach meditation as a chore to add to your to-do list. That’s not kind.
As we continue exploring Everyday Mindfulness – Step 2 in the Freedom from Chronic Stress Program, let’s talk about developing character traits that cultivate inner peace.
You see, sitting in a chair or meditation cushion for 30 minutes every day won’t make you a peaceful person.
The real juice of mindfulness, the practice of being present without judgment, is putting the principles to work in your relationship with yourself and others.
Mindfulness is not sitting in silence for twenty minutes to check out.
It’s about developing awareness so you make discerned, wise choices in each moment, especially the messy moments when you’re tempted to fly off the handle, withdraw, or judge.
This is everyday mindfulness.
Here’s what my client Garla says about putting these pillars into everyday practice.
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Below are the 7 pillars of mindfulness. Reach each one carefully. the definition may not be what it seems.
7 PILLARS OF MINDFULNESS
(adapted from Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness by Jon Kabat-Zinn, PhD)
- NON-JUDGING – I am an impartial witness to my own experience. I am aware of my tendency to categorize experiences as good or bad. I am aware that this tendency creates automatic responses instead of discerned responses.
- PATIENCE – I give time and space to my own unfolding. I honor this process for myself and others.
- BEGINNER’S MIND – I open my mind to experience any encounter as if it was for the first time. I let go illusions of ‘knowing’ so I may be present to my current experience. (one of my clients named this baby brain – love it!)
- TRUST – I trust myself. I do not lend authority to others as the master of my experience (so important for women).
- NON-STRIVING – I release any purpose or goal of my mindfulness practice. I allow presence to be and practice non-doing (may sound un-American, but it’s a peaceful way to live).
- ACCEPTANCE – I accept my current experience with compassion. I have more access to choice when I accept.
- LETTING GO – I let go to the holding of pleasant experiences and the rejection of unpleasant ones.
Choose one pillar that calls to you and experiment with it for the next two weeks…one that would bring peace and harmony to yourself and others.
You’ll have to give this some thought in order to implement it – it doesn’t happen on its own or through hope.
Consider and write down:
- Where could I practice this? (examples include practicing beginner’s mind when in a work meeting with colleagues, practicing patience when your child is not doing a task ‘quickly enough,’ honoring non-judgment when your partner makes a rude comment about your sister, etc.)
- What would practicing this look like? What would I have to restrain from? How would I need to keep my mouth shut or not engage?
- When I practice this mindfulness pillar, how did I and others respond?
How would life be different if you embodied one of these pillars just 50% of the time?
Pretty radical! I practice this way and so do my clients. It takes awareness, compassion, and diligence – not for the faint of heart!
Make sure to be gentle with yourself in the process (don’t judge the judgment) and get support and ideas in our Mindfulness Facebook group with your experience.
Join us and happy experimenting!
